Sucked. I wasn’t a suck-suck movie, but it was definately not good by any standard. I went to see it with Rachel last night and was very disappointed. The film is like 3 hours long and it sucks the whole way through.

Maybe if there had been more ass-kicking and lest jib-jab… All they did was talk about “the end of the world” and how Dr. Manhattan was going to save them all. He didn’t, as it turns out… Like he could have, he was nake the whole time. The only thing I will remember about that film is Manhattan’s shinky-dink penis glowing blue and swaying in the breeze.

Dr. Manhattan is involved with the former Ms. Jupiter, who is also loved by Dan (AKA. Nite Owl). At one point in the movie she and the doctor were about to have sex and the whole time I was thinking, “How is this going to work?” Manhattan is dead by definition and she is definately not. How can you have sex with a dead guy? Also, isn’t he a little bit radioactive? I mean he glows blue…

The only “good” part of the movie was the sex scene. Dan and Lori got completely naked in the flying submarine and started gettin’ it on. And although Dan isn’t the hottest of the superheroes, his buff bod and steamy lips dip not disappoint. In fact, if I had to choose a Wathman to date/do it would be Dan.

But my favorite of the superheroes, as far as powers and abilities go, was probably Rorschach. Though he was the smallest of the group, he definately kicked the most ass. And after all, isn’t that what superheroes are for? He has a deep, dark voice and a mysterious ink-blot face. Through the whole film I was wondering how his mask kept moving even when he took it off… When he did take it off the audience could see that he was only a small, red-headed man scarred and tormented by his past.

I was also amazed by the alarming beauty of Silhouette. Even though she was only in the movie during the opening credits and during a later flashback, she made the biggest impression on me and was the one I will remember for the longest time. Too bad she and her girlfriend were killed for being lesbians.

Song of the day: Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright. This is the song that was playing while they were getting it on in the hoverthing. From now on, every time I hear this song I am going to think of Dan. He’s pretty hot.